|Episode 9 - Benny and Tankorr Take a Break
Benny is walking around Cybertron...
Benny: Damn! Trapped on some ass backwards robot planet in some indeterminate time frame with no one to scam... Jeez. An' I got five kids to feed! Stupid moletank, and shit...
<Turns Corner and walks into Tankorr>
Benny: Watch where you're going bitch! Your disapearin'' red striped ass scared the hell out of me!
Tankorr: Now this is just grand. A human being...
Tankorr: Whatever! A human being, or a close facsimile of one, is walking around Cybertron. Is Megatron employing Organics now, or has Optimus figured out a way to drag you out of the Oracle.
Benny: Naw man, some damned Moletank...
Tankorr: Mr. Bamt...
Benny: Yeah, his fucked up ass dragged me through time to be some sort of ass master...
Benny: You sure with that guy?
Benny: Well, to be some sort of master, or some such shit, and make people apologize or something.
Tankorr: He took my drones.
Benny: So you don't like him either?
Tankorr: About as much as I like having sex with Starscream.
Tankorr: THAT MEANS I DON'T LIKE HIM!
Rattrap and Nightscream are patrolling for no good reason. Nightscream looks worse for wear.
Nightscream: please... stop... shooting... me....
Rattrap: Don't make me reload kid.
Rattrap: <Shoots Nightscream> I warned ya'
<A River bank>
Benny and Tankorr are skipping stones...
Benny: So if Megatron is so anti-organics, why'd he create NickBee?
Tankorr: Simple. It's the fanfic writer's fault.
Benny: This is a fanfic?
Tankorr: Duh. Why do you think there are this many characters thrown in by Traegorn, like NickBee, You, Mr. Bamt, the Diagnostic Drone has been renamed Bob Ski....
Benny: Wait!, you mean he came up with Mr. Bamt?
Tankorr: Well, not the current one writing, and Mr. Bamt sort of came up with himself...
<Flashback -- Ben Yee's Beast Machines Bulletin Board, Late 1999>
<Traegorn/Trægonis>: Dude, calm down...
<You Know Who>: i am guardian of this board........apologize now....
<The Orange>: You are so unfroody.
<Phil Bond>: Hold me Orange, hold me....
<NetworkGuy>: You all need mental help...
Tankorr: So maybe it didn't happen exactly like that...
Benny: Phil is gonna kick Traegorn's ass, huh.
Tankorr: He'll probably try at least....
Benny: Ha! Phil trying to kick Traegorn's ass.... <Skips a stone across the river>
<Back to Elsewhere>
Rattrap: <Into comm. unit> Rattrap to Optimus! Uhh... I kind of hurt Nightscream....
Optimus <Through communicator>: I can't DEAL with that now!
Rattrap: What are you? Ultra Magnus?
Optimus: Uhh, I mean, There's no TIME for that!
<Back to the River>
Benny: So... where exactly did this riverbed come from?
Tankorr: What? A robotic planet can have miles of sewers, and no rivers?
Benny: Sorry, but I got five kids to feed.
Tankorr: Suuure. <Rolls eyes>
Rattrap: 'Eh, will you heal yourself already? I really want to shoot you!
Nightscream: Blow me.
Rattrap: You are so lucky this isn't a Transformers World's Worst Fanfic....
Nightscream: Why? Traegorn RavenHawk started using #wiigii!...
Rattrap: By Primus no....
<Back at the River>
Tankorr: So, that's why I hate Bob Skir.
Benny: He really did that to those poor children?
Benny: But the Sound of Music?
Tankorr: The remastered version.
Tankorr: I know...
<Back to Elsewhere>
Rattrap: So, that's what Optimus' toy looks like.
Nightscream: Oh god... what's gonna happen to us?
Rattrap: I don't know, stinky, I don't know.
<Back at Megatron's Evil Palace of Indifference>
Megatron: Why am I doing nothing?
Bob Skir/Drone: I honestly don't care about you anymore. This Benny Chap is entertaining.
BS/D: Dance puppet! Dance!
Megatron: <dancing around> Oh no....
Unicron's Head: <From the Sky> At least he didn't push you out of shot ever...
<Back to the River>
Benny: So that's when I turned on Arnold...
Tankorr: The weak fleshling deserved it...
Tankorr: And besides, like you said, you got five kids to feed!
<Yet another Elsewhere, but not the first elsewhere>
Cheapwhore and Black-a-whack-nia
Cheetor and BA: HEY!
I mean, Cheetor and Blackarachnia....
Cheetor: Jeez, how bored are you Mr. RavenHawk?
TRH: I'm not bored actually, I just felt that I needed to say what was happening to the rest of the cast.
TRH: Habit, I guess.
BA: Well, stop it already! Get back to the plot.
Cheetor: Even if this is turning into what a Kevin Smith episode of Beast Machines would look like.
TRH: Shut up Hot Rod.
Cheetor: I AM NOT HOT ROD! <runs off>
<Back to the First Elsewhere>
Rattrap: You feelin' better flyboy?
Nightscream: All better!
Rattrap: Good! <Pulls out pistol>
Nightscream: Uhh, Hey! Isn't that a Riverbed over there?
Tankorr: Hmmm... I seem to be tracking a maximal or two.
Benny: Who cares?
Tankorr: Good point
Rattrap and Nightscream walk up, seeing Benny and Tankorr skipping rocks.
Rattrap: eh, what's goin' on.
Tankorr: Skipping rocks.
Tankorr: What else are we going to do?
Rattrap: <eyes Nightscream> Oh, I've got an idea....
<five minutes later>
Benny pulls a lever on a catapult, flinging Nightscream into the air.
Tankorr and Rattrap shoot at him.
Nightscream: Why can't we all just get along? <gasp>